EXPERIENCE SENSUALITY

July 29th, 2007 by shemnoy

I heard a story about a flight attendant of an international airline married to a brilliant fresh graduate from a highly respected university in

Manila

. During their honey moon, when the newly wed couple were in bed, the place was enveloped with total silence, nothing was in motion. Afterwards, the wife begun undressing her husband. Still, the man never moved any finger as his heart was beating faster and faster. The wife started kissing him when all of a sudden he kicked her off, yelling at her “putang ina ka.” Right away, the girl left him. After a week of waiting, the man met his mother-in-law. He told his mother-in-law proudly that he never had any sexual experience before he got married. He did not have any idea about sexual intercourse, that sexual intercourse is penetration, that sexual intercourse is self donation to the beloved. (In short, brilliant man is ignorant in sexual activities. Unbelievable though but it just happened.) That is why when his wife seduced him, he thought she was like a prostitute. (That is also what Filipinos commonly called Modesty Complex - that woman should not initiate sexual affair with her husband.) And he really was afraid of what she had been doing to him. The man begged her pardon but his mother-in-law who is in very good reputation slapped him for calling her daughter “putang ina.” He tried to win her back again but it was too late. She was on duty then and had left the country already. Furthermore, he recalled how pure was their courtship, their dating for three years. They just kissed their hands on parting time. They never engaged or even tried to experience kissing their lips or any romantic affair because he thought it was a sacred thing to do which can be done only after a sacramental blessing is granted unto them. They were able to remain pure [and virgin] until their marriage. Yet, that was how their relationship ended in just a split of seconds. So ironic.

As I reflected upon their case, I can say that succesful married life is not guaranteed by the purity of minds sexually. Well, he is really freak. Guindon states that satisfying coital relations and the ability to communicate coitally as whole persons characterizes happy conjugal unions. In their case, kissing or petting was really a missing ingredient to their relationship. Somehow, I would like to justify the necessity of knowing one’s partner sexually through kissing and/or petting – without necessarily arriving at coitus. When they only had done such a thing, even an intimate lip-kissing, that could somehow save their marriage. We cannot deny that we are also sexual being. Thus, we need to relate sexually. Sexual language, according to Guindon, communicates intimacy. Its content is essentially “Who we are”, and not “What we do.” As for me, petting is not really bad because it is one of the best opportunities to know your partner intimately from her feelings, her weakness, strength, almost everything if not all. It is really a matter of getting to know each other. It is our self that we are communicating. Self-knowledge is the key to self-acceptance, said Timmerman. We have purpose, however, we cannot have its complete meaning unless we are aware of our self – how much we love, how far can we go. Unless we do not know what we have, what we can give, we remain incomplete, unhappy, unfulfilled.

In the article of Sexual Intimacy, quoting JP II’s nuptial meaning of the human body, it describes that to be a human being is to be naturally made to find happiness and fulfillment, completeness as a person, in some sort of nuptial intimacy, to achieve the nuptial meaning that is born into our bodies. Thus, all of us are called to enjoy intimacy with our sexual completeness. Failure in nuptial meaning (that is, in our encounter with other fellow human being of both sexes) is a failure in loving, failure in living. It is incomplete, empty. Every encounter of human person is really sexual, not genital, said in the same article. It describes that it is an instance of intimacy involving the complementarity of the sexes. It is in this intimacy, our love for each other, that is our intimacy with God, an experience of the divine. After all, love is not feeling, it is willing – to make sense, to be complete, to be happy, to be a part of other while remaining whole in ourself.

If the couple had only experienced each other’s sensuality through touching, fondling, kissing, even petting, then they may be willing to know and accept their partner’s vulnerability. Indeed, he regrets he never kissed his wife on her lips. His sorry could no longer bring his wife back who is now living with British businessman.

KAPATIRAN 2007

February 4th, 2007 by shemnoy

Inculturation in Seminary Formation @ St. Alphonsus Regional Seminary, Lucena City.

Have a tour @ http://shemnoy.blogs.friendster.com/photos/kapatiran_2007/dsc03051.html

The Value of Person in Me

January 20th, 2007 by shemnoy

So many privileges I really took advantage here in San Jose. Quality education, counseling with professionals, great living are just a few. All these I owe so much to San Jose. However, when I see how these things affect me, I was shunned. I thought they were opportunities, privileges to be taken advantage. I was wrong. Well, although to see it literally, these are a once and for all privilege. No doubt San Jose is desirable because of its excellence in human formation. I said I was wrong because the real thing here is that these are not just opportunities to be taken advantage. These are the value of person – the necessity, the need to realize my full potential of being in my person through creativity, relationship and self-awareness. To understand otherwise is good as failure because first and foremost, I am here to be a man for others, not for my self. This is my constant reflection nowadays. Although, at first glance, the impressions are screened by my self, nevertheless, it is always in reflection of the other – my community – for I believe I am always directed to my community. Of course, I still have private life such as silence, personal prayer, studies. But all of these I do because this is the way I respect the need of my community. In other words, boundaries go beyond the limits of my self. This is the realization of my being as person in always loving communion with my self for others. This is my point why I said the above mentioned privilege are not merely privileges, but value, the necessity of being a person in realizing my full potential.

Ang Salang Panulondon

September 19th, 2006 by shemnoy

“Baptism washes away our original sin”, I said during my lecture on pre-baptism seminar in our parish. One raised his hand and asked, “What is the original sin?” I was stunned what to say in response to the question. Really, that event put me into dark cloud to hide my shame in front of the people who were preparing and representing their children to receive the sacrament of baptism. Fresh from philosophy, I tried to get away with the question for I am not sure what to say. Anyway, I managed to simply say, recalling my catechesis in elementary, Original Sin is ‘kasalanang mana’. It is the sin which we inherited from the fore parents, Adam and Eve. It is the sin of disobedience from the command of God not to eat the fruit of the tree of life and death, and pride of becoming like God. Since Adam represents the human race and Eve as the mother of living creatures, we as the their descendants bear the effect of their sin they committed and lost the paradise where immortality and happiness and peace reign, that is why there is suffering and death in consequence to that sin.

I remembered that sad story of mine because of the topic at hand – original sin. In this paper, I would like to get back into that situation where I can now give my answer to the one who had the guts to ask that question.

I personally believed that kasalanang mana as the vernacular of original sin is not appropriate. In our term, kasalanang mana is translated as inherited sin, not original sin. Thus, kasalanang mana is very far from original sin in real sense. I mean the idea of both does not really capture one another’s nature. That’s what I believed.

From this view, I would like to present the church teaching, with biblical foundation on its belief about original sin. In addition to that is Filipino culture’s understanding of original sin and its implications in our belief.

What Does the Church Say?

The Church teaches that “Adam, the first man, by transgressing God’s commandment in paradise, at once lost the holiness and justice in which he had been constituted and drew upon himself death”, (CCC 376). Adam, being the father of the human race, not historically but mythologically, had lost the holiness and justice not only for himself but for all his descendants.

It is not the personal sin of Adam that we inherit but rather the sinful condition, a condition in which each of us is personally involved. This condition is the state of sinfulness in which we all are born. This is what we inherit. Thus, it is kasalanang mana in that sense.

Original sin is the privation of sanctifying grace in consequence of the sin of Adam. As death is the privation of the principle of life, the death of the soul is the privation of sanctifying grace which according to all theologians is the principle of supernatural life. Therefore, if original sin is the death of the soul, it is the privation of sanctifying grace.

The Church describes original sin as the state in which we are born as members of the human race; (CFC 383). It is ORIGINAL since it dates back from the origin of our human race. This means it is universal. It is a “dogma of our Christian Faith that we all need to be redeemed”, (CFC 376). It is called SIN not because it is a personal sinful thought, word or action on our part, but because it is a “state contrary to God’s will, (CFC 383). CCC further says that that is why original sin is called SIN only in an analogical sense; it is a sin contracted, not committed – a state, and not an act. (CCC 404) This means that our loving relation with God is deeply affected, in as much as our relation with others, to become our true selves and achieve our destiny.

            

St. Augustine

says that the deliberate sin of the first man Adam is the cause of original sin. St. Anselm on the other hand says that the sin of Adam was one thing but the sin of children at their birth is quite another. The former was the cause, the latter was the effect. In a child, original sin is distinct from the fault of Adam; it is one of its effects. To see the effects are the following:

First is death and suffering. In his letter to the Romans,

St. Paul

writes that “as sin came into the world through one man and death through sin… (RSV Rom. 5, 12). From the standpoint of morality, these are described as natural evils and cannot be called sins. Natural because they would really come unexpectedly whether we like it or not. Second is concupiscence. This is a rebellion of the lower appetite transmitted to us by Adam. This is an occasion and temptation to sin, but not yet sin. Thus, though Baptism effaced original sin, concupiscence remains in the person baptized. The absence of the sanctifying grace for Adam, having received holiness and justice from God, lost for himself and for all his descendants as well. This is also a kind of effect to the original sin. Thus, there is a need for GRACE, a constant turning towards God, to gain back union with God, and that Grace unites us intimately with God.

Kasalanang Mana and Filipino Catholics

            Dionisio Miranda of the Society of Divine Word writes that sin in Filipino culture is described as personalist and attitudinal in character, as well as objective as verified in actual relationships. (Filipino Catholics and Christian Morality, DIWA Studies in Philosophy and Theology, vol. XXVIII, no. 1, May 2003, p. 7.)

He describes sin in three experiences which in the same manner captures the Filipino understanding of original sin. First, he said that sin is understood as PAGKUKULANG. It is when our actions fall short of certain ideals. If we cannot fulfill our expectations of ourselves, how much more the expectations of others! Sin, of course, doest not only refer to the fact of shortcomings, failure, or neglect but to the required awareness and free decision not to fulfill the obligated expectations. Second is PAGKAKAMALI. This is when our actions violate the moral norms inherent in pagpapakatao and pakikipagkapwa-tao. As imperfect humans we can contravene rules that we have recognized as necessary and reasonable for reasons peculiar to each one of us. Another description of original sin when we betray ourselves as human beings irrationally and inexplicably is KASIRAAN. This radically corrupts the meaning of pagpapakatao and pakikipagkapwa-tao as shown in the reality of rape, terrorism, torture, genocide, and the like. From all of these, only this one – KASIRAAN – does not deserve the name kapwa or tao. Pagkukulang is understandable. Pagkakamali is forgivable. But Kasiraan is not acceptable at all.

Religious Implications

            Sin occurs when we indulgently foil God’s expectations of us to become more and more God’s children. Sin is when we cavalierly violate the norms God has set as signposts to our vocation and communicated clearly through the Church. Sin is when we debase God’s image implanted in our inmost being through baptism. Therefore, sin is the rejection of God’s offers to enter into a loving relationship with God and God’s creation.

            In contrast to sin as pagkukulang, pagkakamali and kasiraan, the Grace of God is pagpupuno, pagtutuwid and paglilikhang-muli in God’s Son Jesus, the true and perfect TAO and KAPWA through the Spirit.

            Just as Jesus died under the weight of Sin, so Christians must accept the possibility of death in the struggle against sin. Only this creation and humanity be restored to the One who created it from the beginning.

Reflection

            From this, I could no longer say kasalanang mana in our vernacular is not original sin. I admit I was wrong in believing as mentioned above. Indeed, it is original sin in our own context and in our own culture. It is an inherited sin from the sinful community where we belong. I think it is from this point where I can say evil must have come from, not just from our own individual sins but also from the “sinful social structures” which PCP II emphasized. Nevertheless, St. Paul gives us the hope for the grace of God available for all in Rom. 5, 15 “…For if many died through one man’s trespass, much more have the grace of God and the free gift in the grace of that one man Jesus Christ abounded for many.” Furthermore, even in the hard times in the struggle against the presence of evil in the world, the letter to the Hebrews gives us also the challenge to counter evil through the inspiration of the cross of Jesus which brought forth love and mercy; Hebrews 12,1 says “…let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, 2 looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.”

            Fr. Joey Rapadas of the Prelature of Ipil said in his homily that in the old order, woman was taken from the rib of the man. Now, in the new order, man was coming out from the woman (Mary giving birth to Jesus). If Adam and Eve enjoyed in the garden beforehand with all the liberty, Jesus and Mary struggled very hard against the pressing Roman authorities. If Adam and Eve were disobedient to God’s commandment, Jesus and Mary said YES to the will of the Father even up to the cross. If Adam and Eve were sent away from the garden, Jesus and Mary returned to the Father in the fullness of glory through Resurrection and Ascension. I think this is a good comparison between the effects of the sin and the effects of our fidelity to the Father’s love. In the end of the story, it is not ‘man is evil’. But ‘God is merciful and savior’.

UST - SJS dual encounter + Family Day

September 12th, 2006 by shemnoy

another year has passed by with our friends, familes and loved ones… yet thier memories last forever. just click on th link to view their lasting remembrance.

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/sjsyon/album?.dir=/1bd8scd

we hope to remain in their hearts, as well as in thier souls.

101_0570 we pray for you, and we need your prayers too.

the celebrities

May 29th, 2006 by shemnoy

Me_and_leah_andanaryu with Leah Andanar-Yu, ANC newscaster.

With_leah_andanaryu_at_the_back_stage the full view at the back stage.

picnic 2006

May 28th, 2006 by shemnoy

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/sjsyon/album?.dir=/838bscd

community picnic at pandaquit, san antonio, zambales.

ballgame

February 26th, 2006 by shemnoy

we all have the right place . . .

http://www.crazyclip.ws/movie/895432.html (check where is that?)

at the right time . . .

apostolate day with flying colors

February 21st, 2006 by shemnoy

another day had gone… and everybody made it with flying colors.

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/sjsyon/album?.dir=/e1c3

…a memory that lasts forever!

happy trip

February 8th, 2006 by shemnoy

do you want to have a trip to vigan, ilocos sur?                                Heritage

here is the most possible and easy way… happy trip!

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/sjsyon/album?.dir=cf84&.src=ph&store=&prodid=&.done=http%3a//photos.yahoo.com/ph//my_photos